It’s been too long

way too long
jaysonpotter.com

No, I haven’t fallen off the edge of the earth. And no, I haven’t been too busy playing tennis to blog. Sadly, tennis isn’t in my plans for the near future, and by near future I mean several months. Almost 3 weeks out from my knee surgery, I can say that without crying. I’m not happy about it, but frankly, as bad as my knee was and as hard as the recovery has been, I can’t even imagine playing. I’m glad the US Open coincided with my convalescence; it kept me entertained and still, which is a tall order for this busybody.

I expected recovery to be hard, but I didn’t realize how time-consuming rehab would be. I do physical therapy and a modified workout 5 days a week, with one day of just PT and 20 minutes on the bike and one day of rest & recovery to round out my week. The rest & recovery day is the hardest for me. I love the free time early in the day, but by about 2 p.m. I’m antsy and jonesing for a good sweat.

Been spending more time than I ever have, ever in my whole life, sprawled on the couch in front of the TV, exhausted and spent. After getting my kids off to school, doing PT and the modified workout, running an errand or two and feeding myself, I’m done. All I can manage is to splay out; lifting my arm to point the remote at the TV is a big chore. Such a strange state of being for me. I’m trying to be patient, and of course being so so so tired helps in that pursuit.

The good news is that progress is being made. While the PT is brutal, and forcing my knee to do things it most definitely does not want to do is hard work, I can see real improvement over the previous week. I’m still under strict orders to let the pain be my guide, but I’m pushing myself a bit more every day. Yesterday the big accomplishment was step-ups (stepping up onto a low bench and forcing my knee to bend as if I were going up a flight of stairs). At first, the bending motion was excruciating, but by about the 20th rep it got easier. Today it was a modified squat with the big rubber ball. Real squats, which were a big part of my life pre-surgery, are off the menu for me, forever. Or as long as I have this cartilage-deficient knee. If I choose to get a new knee, I can squat all day long, but with this old clunker, no squats and no lunges. If I linger too long on the fact that I can’t do two of my favorite exercises–in addition to the moratorium on tennis–I’ll get very sad, so I’m zipping right on by those topics. Gonna try and focus on what I can do, and see how far that gets me. For now, the list of things I can do is pretty short, but I’m doing those things with less pain overall, so I’m calling that a win. I have a newfound respect for anyone who lives with chronic pain. Knowing that mine is temporary is comforting (although 3 weeks is a loooong time when you’re in the thick of it!).

 

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9 Comments on “It’s been too long”

  1. billgncs says:

    work hard and get it 100% back — you won’t regret it!

  2. David Benbow says:

    The longest journeys begin with a single step. You’ve come a long way, both before and since your knee surgery, and however long your recovery takes, I’ll bet a typical recovery is at least twice that long. You’re a fighter, my friend.

  3. Wendy Langley says:

    SWIM!

  4. You’re going to make it! I just know it, Nancy. Your patience will pay off. xox

  5. ah so sorry you are having a hard time with this..but you will get through it…keep writing..we love to hear from you..i gotta say though..that handlebar moustache was very distracting ;-)

  6. Keep us posted….you are one tough Gal, you will come through this!

  7. Best of luck with rehab Nancy … those little ones need ya – it’ll come. Look at what you’ve already defeated!

  8. Renn says:

    Nancy, I sooo understand the place of frustration from which you write! Going through what you’re going through is a pain in the butt (and the knee!). It sucks that you have to find “new” favorite exercises. I’m sorry your tennis game is sidelined and so much of your day is spent working through the pain. Keep taking it a day, an hour, at a time. And PS: Where the heck did you find that mustache guy? OMG! Thank you for the laugh! xoxo


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