P-P-P-Poker face

This is what Payton looked like getting off the bus yesterday after school. 

Yikes, right?

Isn’t it every parent’s nightmare to see their child hurt? And bleeding? And in pain? And knowing we weren’t there to prevent it from happening? And why do these things always seem to happen when I’m flying solo, with Trevor out of town?

He limped in the house and as I glanced up from my perch at the computer, I saw a big gash on his sweet face and blood dripping down the length of a giant wound. My first thought was WHAT HAPPENED??? Then I thought, man, that is so close to his eye. Luckily he has the longest eyelashes in the world, which practically wrap around his head and offer unparalleled protection from menacing things.

But the wrap-around eyelashes had met their match with this injury. Before I could get the words out to ask WHAT HAPPENED??? and WHO DO I NEED TO BEAT UP??? he came into my office and tried to tell me he got in a fight.

I say “tried to tell me” because that boy has absolutely no poker face. None. Not even a little bit. Like George Washington as a boy, he cannot tell a lie. It’s a great thing for a parent to have a kid so devoid of poker-faceing. We’ve told Pay from day one that he can’t lie to us without us knowing he’s lying. At first, he thought it had to do with some omniscient parenting skills, but later learned it’s his mug. He gives himself away every time. I love it. He literally can’t keep a straight face — the corners of his mouth move on their own and his eyes dart all over the place. If he’s ever under investigation for anything, he will crack like an egg.

So he was trying to tell me that he got into a fight, and while the words were indeed coming out of  his mouth, his mouth was also doing its jitterbug, giving him away before he could even get the story out into the ether.

The real story: his speech teacher used him as a model for stage make-up techniques. Ms Pointer at First Colony Middle School knows her stuff. He was the only one in his class who raised his hand as a volunteer, and she did it up right. If only his acting skills were as good as her make-up skills, he might have convinced me.

Never a dull moment around here.